Learning To Love My Body As A Nonbinary Person

Pulling away from society’s gendered views of what makes us attractive

Forced to cover up to make other people feel comfortable

I was rather late compared to my other afab friends in wearing a bra because it was sensory problem for me. But my lack of wearing a small piece of cloth soon became quite a subject of conversation.

So, i’m not good looking?

All through my teens I had family members tell me I would look pretty:

You don’t look good

And because of this I couldn’t feel good.

All it did was to further teach me that I should hate the way I looked

I hated having a body that society objectifies and sexualises just because I have a few bumps and curves in some places. I hated being constantly told that being myself wasn’t attractive. I didn’t want to be a girl because I never felt like I was one, but I did want to be allowed the freedom to feel comfortable in looking just like me.

Fast forward to a life changing moment

The wonderful day I realised I was non binary. This was such a life changing event for me because I was finally realising why I had often felt uncomfortable with gendered things, and I had now found a part of me I had been looking for.

Light bulb moment!

I have spent years working on building up a positive view of how I see myself, inside and out. I have finally realised that my body doesn't need to be a certain weight or size to be seen as attractive or to feel good, it just needs to be kept healthy and left to do it’s thing.

Then it finally smacked me in the face.

Because, for one, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Everyone has their own definition of what looks attractive. Secondly, I shouldn’t be giving a flying elephant what others think of my appearance, if I feel good, that’s all that matters.

We can’t change the past

Really trying to refrain from carrying on into a full blown Disney reference right now. But that wise baboon was right. In order to fully accept myself I had to let go of the past.

To you lovely lot

You are amazing and beautiful, no matter how you choose to dress or present yourself, no matter your size or weight, no matter what your gender, or if you don’t present how society thinks you should.



Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store
Tasha's Little Corner

Hello! I write about equality, mental health, the climate crisis, and social justice. Welcome to my little corner of the world.